iLiza's eyes

I had an "I'm going to live forever" moment today. I was in Philly (yes, I made it to Philly and back in under 24 hours), walking in the oddly beautiful October weather-- and I realized how much longer I have to live. It didn't feel abstract, suddenly, it felt tangible and real: I didn't just think it, I knew it.

Feelings like this come along rarely for me. I think for many people, they're just concepts that you're intellectually aware of, but not truly understanding. They often come for me at times when I have to wait for something, like when my desire for immediate satisfaction is hindered by the annoyance of bad timing.

It seems so typical that we hear phrases like "Wait a few years," or "maybe in the future it'll work out." And the future seems so far away...and it is...but it's also all we have.

On my walk today I thought back to where I was 3 years ago. And I thought of all the ways I was different, all the things I've done and suffered through and accomplished. It was a true "How did I get here?" moment.

And then it was terrifying. To imagine three years from now; everything else I can do in that time. The possibility that lies in even a short life. I thought maybe that's the point of it all: to acknowledge those fleeting moments of amazement and gratefulness at our simple little lives, and truly appreciate.

posted by iliza @ 11:05 PM