On so many levels I feel like rebelling against juicing out meaning and pinning down labels. Because what do they mean anyway?
What does it mean to define a relationship? What is a boyfriend? What is a best friend? Well, by definition they're people in your lives, but the way we each label them is individual and unique to ourselves; what makes my best friend a best friend is not what makes your's your's. And what is a boyfriend really, beyond the feelings that lay esoteric between two people, they way you decide to conduct yourself, the way he decides he must conduct himself too?
Our definitions are meaningless: simply societal constuctions that help us pin down an emotion or an action or a responsibility. It's a way of making ourselves feel legitimate in our actions, in our feelings and a method of protecting our fragile confidences. But in no way is a definition a course of action, or an immortal promise, or an actual change of attitude.
A definition is just words: formulated expressions that we construct in our heads which can be molded and conformed and altered and destroyed. And when I think about it that way, I have to almost laugh: because isn't our courage to truly feel, and to act in accordance with those feelings so much stronger than those silly words? Why do we feel that we need language to hold something together that's too strong and complicated and organic to even be expressed in words at all?
posted by iliza @ 12:28 AM
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